I'm a Big Kid Now!

The month of May and beginning of June brought about incredible change and amazing, new experiences for me as I graduated college and have just recently started my new job. As it has all unfolded and I've done and cared for more and more 'grown-up' stuff than I ever thought possible, I can't help but sing the little jingle from when I was little: "Mommy, wow! I'm a big kid now!"

Haha… alright, my 'big kid' life certainly doesn't relate to Huggies and um, leak protection… but that got me thinking even further about how my life is protected. And it's protected by much more than a pair of pants, but rather by my Lord and Savior. With each new "real-world reality" experience that I've encountered this past month, I can't help but see God's hand through it all… giving me the upmost confidence and joy as I enter into this new stage of life.

Obviously the first step of moving on was graduating and leaving East Lansing. The last few days at State were filled with so much joy and celebration. I spent time with the people I love and was continually reminded of how faithful and gracious God has been to me throughout my college career. I can look back and see that the experiences I was able to take part in, the relationships that were formed, and the opportunities that were presented to me were only by His grace and culminated into one amazing collegiate career. One which has also prepared me for what is to come.

Last volleyball-family hoo-rah :)

After graduation, I planned a little vacation for myself to see my brother at school in New Ulm, MN, and my friends in Tijuana and LA. Now not only were all of these destinations new to me, but all very, very different - from what I know and from each other. Yet in each place I was able to see and be reminded of God and His omnipresence.

Visiting Josh at MLC and getting to see his school and the community in which he's surrounded was incredible. You can just feel God there because He has made His dwelling in all of the students and community. As jealous as I may have been of the fellowship and encouragement that Josh is engrossed and surrounded in everyday, I couldn't help but think that I, too, was blessed in an entirely different way at Michigan State, a very secular school - quite the opposite of MLC. Living in such rich community like at MLC could have easily become a stumbling block to me if I wasn't careful - depending on the 'righteous people' I'm surrounded by rather than God to fulfill and build me up in the ways only He can. But being surrounded by the secular views and examples of blatant disbelief and sin at State created a longing inside of me to get to know my Savior more and more. It was a subtle reminder that God's timing and placement is perfect and that He will sustain me regardless of the environment - I just have to be faithful and abide in Him.

I then went to visit my best friend Ashley, who's on a mission trip in Tijuana right now with an orphanage. Going to Mexico was a culture shock for me not only because I don't know a lick of Spanish except maybe gracias and hola, but I've never crossed the southern border or seen the slums. Despite my discomfort, I felt such love and joy overflow from the kids into me. It was incredible to see, as Ashley had shared with me, their utter dependence on God... and in a way that I cannot and will not ever know. These kids have come from broken homes, abusive relationships, drugs, prostitution, you name it... and are still able to find hope and love and joy in their Savior because He is literally all they have. It was so beautiful, and a great reminder and encouragement to me, that my dependence on God should not be circumstantial, but continual - because we all are nothing and have nothing without Jesus' loving sacrifice. 

Finally, Ashley and I went up to LA to visit one of our good friends, Emma. It was such a blessing to spend time with some of my best friends and sisters in Christ... to be encouraged and spurred on and talk about everything. Even more, being in LA surrounded by all the things - the glitz and glam and money and materialism... it was a culture shock all over again after being in two completely opposite places! How sad of a life would you have if you really thought that this was it... Seeing this materialism contrasted against MLC and Tijuana gave me great perspective which lead right into my next 'new' life experience.

The month between school and my job starting wasn't all vacations and fun and games, I also had some preparations to make. Getting Insurance in my name... Opening a New Bank Account... Car Titles... Apartment Furniture and Items to prep for being on my own... Utility Bills... Budgeting... Buying a Car... Getting a Paycheck. It's as though my parents had been counting down to this day when they could finally cut the strings or something! ;) Figuring all of this out was exciting as I really started gaining a sense of independence, but it was also a little overwhelming, especially when I kept seeing the amounts of money that needed to be forked out for each new venture! But I was reminded more than once that I'm really just God's steward taking care of all of His things. What an honor that He would trust me with His possessions! And when I honor Him through my tithes and responsibility, He will always make it work out... even if I don't understand how. This precious promise has given me even more excitement as I can responsibly enter into this new stage of independence... or really this stage of fuller dependence on Him. 

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast,
because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever,
for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal." -Isaiah 26:3-4

Another part of being on my own that I've been praying about is finding community. Going from an environment where I had teammates and classmates and fellow athletes and roommates to an area where I only know my co-workers is quite an adjustment. But God continues to show up and remain faithful. Although I've only been here one weekend, I was immediately welcomed and felt uplifted by the church I went to that was suggested to me by my pastor in East Lansing. As I've grown and matured as a young Christian woman, it has been these Christian communities that have become the most important and impactful elements to my faith. It looks like God is already one step ahead of me in providing another young and Christ-centered community that I'll be able to call not only friends but also brothers and sisters. 

Furthermore, despite the distance between me and all of my friends from State, I have been continually uplifted by them, providing me even more comfort as I make my home in a new area. I'm reminded again and again after I talk with each of them how much God has blessed me through wonderful friends and that distance doesn't really matter when He is at the center of it all... I have friends who aren't afraid to ask me the tough questions about my walk with God... friends who encourage me to walk as a godly and loving woman with a servant heart... and friends who uplift me through their own walk and faithfulness to the Lord. I'm overwhelmed when I consider how God has and does continue to provide exactly what - and who - I need to keep me close to Him, despite distance or things I may consider as obstacles. So with God's past faithfulness as my source of peace and confidence, I'm excited to faithfully follow Him and be encouraged by the people He has and will place in my life in Rochester Hills. 

And finally, what would all this 'new' be without the job that has prompted it all?! I can't even describe how blessed I have been to start at a company that totally takes care of and cares for their employees, where everyone genuinely wants to see everyone else succeed. We have fun and work hard and it's (so far at least!) been a great place to work. And with Colossians 3:17 being my guide, "whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him," I know that I will be able to find fulfillment in whatever my job title or description is because it's all for and by God!

I don't think I can say enough how amazing it has been to witness God's faithfulness to me during this season of life. And because of it, I can joyfully and confidently proclaim that "I'm a big kid now!" with my Lord and Savior protecting me under His wing, allowing me to continue to walk by faith. 

"He holds victory in store for the upright, he is a shield
to those whose walk is blameless, for he guards
the course of the just and protects the way of his faithful ones."
-Proverbs 2:7-8

The Sparty Countdown... #2 & #1

This is it! The best of the best! Here are the top 2 things I have come to love and will miss the most from college:





#2 - Competing on the Big Stage
Big Life. Big Stage. Big 10. We've all seen the commercials and heard the slogan, and wow, is it ever true. I have been so blessed to have competed for MSU in the Big 10 - the best volleyball conference in the nation - where every single night is a battle, most likely against a Top-25 team. Cathy would always give us the analogy that we were performers - actors you could say - and the court was our stage. We were putting on a performance for the crowd and in order for it to be a successful production, we had to get all of our 'lines' or 'acts' right and work together. Boy, am I going to miss that stage.

I'm especially going to miss that stage because I am a competitor through and through. And I don't think I ever felt more exhilaration and excitement competing than when I did on the big stage donning my green and white. It may have taken me most of my career to let go of any inhibitions and of the fear of making mistakes or not pleasing coach; but once I finally did let go, the complete freedom and joy that I felt and played with was indescribable. I loved playing volleyball and I loved competing! And I think the best part was knowing that all the while I was able to give God the glory because I finally figured out that it wasn't about me, or the stats, or coach, or even the wins (as hard as that is to say!). It was about using my gifts to their fullest and just having fun glorifying Him. And that is where my joy and excitement and competitiveness were able to flow from so purely.

Even more than missing the joy and freedom and excitement I felt competing will be all of the little things that went into game-day and my competition. Competing with my teammates and working through the struggles to have great team dynamics and chemistry... thinking through and practicing the game plan and strategy... the adrenaline rushing through me during a game and especially during the critical moments... the determination, the intensity, and the look of being in the zone and seeing it my teammates as well... the awesome physical and mental feeling of getting that huge block... the stare-downs... the overpass fisty 5-foot-line kills... being one step ahead of the competition and just smiling knowing that we're going to win and can't be stopped... and celebrating after a huge point (or even the little ones, in my case). Oh, what I wouldn't give for another 'jump spin-fist pump-stomp' combo celebration! I wish competing and playing could last forever (and I'm sure to many people it seemed like it did with my redshirt year!) but my achey-breaky-grandma body has had enough, and I think the NCAA has a few rules about my eligibility being up as well.... But competing for Michigan State University has definitely been one of my favorite things and something I will always cherish and carry with me.

#1 - My Christian Communities 

As if the rest of my countdown wasn't enough to prove God's goodness to me throughout my time at MSU, he richly blessed me with amazing Christian fellowship and communities: my church - Shepherd of the Hills, Athletes in Action, and our team bible study. These 3 communities in conjunction with most of my best friends - who are also fellow brothers and sisters in Christ - have been the most important people to me throughout my career because of the foundation we share on Christ and the way they have spurred me on in my faith. It's so obvious that there was something so right about all of these people, because after saying goodbye to each 'group' after my final meeting or service, I cried... a lot. It was hard and sad to say goodbye to the communities that have helped mold me and support me in my walk with the Lord. And I don't think I fully appreciated the ease and simplicity with which I was able to walk into these uplifting and sound communities. Being on a team, having an athlete campus ministry, finding a wonderful church... it was all just there. Now I know and pray I will always be surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses, but nothing will ever quite compare to walking and living daily life with teammates and fellow Christian athletes in a similar environment.

Throughout college the importance of Christian fellowship has been made so apparent to me. God showed up in a BIG way and showed me that despite my resolve and stubbornness and firm convictions, I couldn't maintain true devotion with Him alone. I was weekly and daily fed the truth at church and encouraged and loved on by my congregation. I was able to be supported, poured into, and uplifted by fellow believers at AIA. And I was able to live daily life in fellowship and learn how to honor God in volleyball with some of my believing teammates. I was presented with differing beliefs and views which challenged me and made me turn to God, I was surrounded by friends that had the same convictions as me, I was held accountable in word, actions, and love by fellow believers, and I was poured into and challenged to have an outward-centered faith that didn't keep my salvation to myself. Although, again, it is painful to say goodbye to all of the amazing people that have impacted me and helped me stay on the straight and narrow path, I first of all know that my goodbye is simply a "see you later," and second I know God will continue to show up in my life and surround me people that will help me stay close to Him in the future.


In case you haven't been able to tell, I have loved and been incredibly blessed during my 5 years at Michigan State. These Top 10 moments and things are what I have come to love most and will always cherish. And I think the greatest part about all of this is that because the best of the best consist of all people and relationships, I can actually carry this part of MSU on with me into the future. I praise God for opening up the door for me to attend State in the first place and seeing me through safely and beautifully to my graduation today.

"Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances."

A Committed Life

Yesterday morning when I was getting ready for church, I hit the snooze button just a few too many times. I was therefore also running late. But, no speeding for me during Lent!! At first when I was leaving my apartment, I tried justifying it in my head, "Well, God, don't you want me to be in church on time? So it should be ok for me to speed to get there... just this once." But I knew I shouldn't because I had already made that commitment to Him not to speed so I can literally and figuratively slow down.

This turned into quite the blessing in disguise. Ok, nothing major like missing an accident... well, who knows actually. But I was able to spend some time on my own in worship in my car. After, of course, I prayed that God would help alleviate my impatience and frustration. Which also subsided.

When I did get to church, our sermon lesson was about Abraham being tested by God to sacrifice his only son Isaac (Genesis 22). Now there is a picture of someone walking by faith, of a Christ-centered commitment... nothing like a Lenten sacrifice of not speeding.

Clearly Abraham was upset and confused by this test and trial that God presented him - Isaac was his only son, born to him in old age, and supposed to be the offspring of the promised Savior! But, even in his doubt and hurt, he - and even Isaac - complied, trusted God, and obeyed what God said. He was committed in his faith and trusted God's plan, as confusing as it may be. In turn, because of his faithfulness, God stopped Abraham before he actually sacrificed his son. And he provided a substitute ram for the sacrifice instead. Just a few of the many reasons we shouldn't doubt God's plan:

• "For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength." (1 Corinthians 1:25). We don't have a CLUE when it comes to God's plan. I'd like to think as an Academic All-American that I'm pretty smart, but to come close to the wisest man? Nah... I mean, it's not like I came up with the Fibonacci code (do I even know what that is?) or invented electricity or anything. And this kind of mind-blowing wisdom on earth... that's rubbish and foolishness to God. Hahaha. 

• "In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed." (1 Peter 1:6-7). These trials and tests aren't for God's pleasure and enjoyment. They're for us. God uses tests and trials to reveal what's on the inside of our heart and purify us, refine us, and make us pure and holy. Not only is our faith in the midst of these circumstances credited to us as righteousness (Hebrews 11) but we also find out that God is more faithful to us than we ever thought. God shows up for those who love and follow Him.  

This lesson from Abraham and Isaac is such a beautiful picture of what God had to go through when sacrificing his son Jesus for us. God was clearly upset and in agony over having to sacrifice and abandon his only Son. But he loved us enough to go through with it anyways (John 3:16). When we are faithful and believe in Him, Jesus acts as our holy, perfect substitute before God. God followed through on his commitment to us so that I can be saved and live in heaven with Him. I think a little commitment about not speeding... or reading my Bible... or being devoted in prayer... or loving others as myself... can be followed through out of love and praise to Him too.

The sobering and sacrificial sight of what our sin cost our Savior.
The ultimate picture of sacrificial love and commitment.